Thursday, September 25, 2014


Good rainy morning! I am here at the home office thinking about my latest hair-brained decision. What decision, you may ask?

Well, my decision has been to resign as Bullpen Mom. That's right. I am giving my notice effective last week. Today, the big guy will get the letter as a legal document giving up my position as his beloved momma.

Huh? What happened?

Well, if you are a regular reader, you know about his decision making, inability to think past his next fast ball, and the lack of attention to details. Ok, I have these issues too (except for the fast ball), but when he threw me under the bus with the landlord, I knew that it was time to take drastic action.

Here is the story.....fade to black.....

As you know, he is terrible when it comes to doing things that he does not want to do.....internship....getting the sofa and things out of the old apartment.....talking to the landlord about the aforesaid sofa and belongings.....paying parking tickets...finishing applications for scholarships and aid....and so on and so on and so on....

When I received the notice from the old landlord that I would be taken to the magistrate with a lien slapped onto me, he did not take ownership but said: "I'm screwed." You're screwed? I was the one who co-signed, because I thought that if he is mature enough to live on his own, he would be mature enough to take on details.

Nope...I was wrong.

When he called this week and was angry because the landlord would not budge, he threw the lien-ball back in my court.

"Uh, no, Dude; this one is on you. Fix it."

At that point, he cussed....and said: "If you are going to yell at me, I am going to hang up. I'll talk to you when you calm down." Click.

Honest to Pete. I never raised my voice or got angry. All I said was "You own this, fix it."

That was the last that I heard from him. And so, what does a momma do?

I suppose if she really loved her child, she would back off and let the chips fall with each decision that he makes. Dad will fix the lien, but he is on his own until he learns how to speak kindly and with respect to his ma, and take ownership of his mistakes.

And so, with a heavy heart, I will send the letter of resignation to be rescinded with an apology and a vow of transparency. That's it.

Until then, I will devote my motherly time to over-mothering Tink and the pups...yep....a little culinary therapy.....oh yeah, I can catch up at work too.

Lastly, I want to be clear....this is a boy that I love more than life itself. He is the frosting on my cake....

but tough times require tough decisions....with the apathy toward the lien, I had to make a decision that would have a lasting impact on him. Do I have the money to bail him out? Of course! Will I? Nope...I am not his mother any more....

Taking a break.....perhaps I will go fishing.....

By the way, he hit 92 in front of the scouts...can any one say "Bazinga!?"


Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Scout day

Greetings! I am back home and at work. True to form, as soon as I give a test or quiz in class and people do not do well, the atmosphere changes from excitement and anticipation to growling and rumbles about how unfair the professor is (uh, that would be me....).

I was up early with the pups trying...really trying.....begging....pleading....'go poo'....please....'go poo'....we were outside in the wet dew and shivering but I was not giving in....neither were they. The result-'no poo' and we went back in three times....after the third try and pulling them out of the mulch, I gave up. A BPM can lead a dog to the potty spot, but he or she does not have to poo if he or she does not want to....just an FYI about how fun it is to train puppies. And I adopted two of them...not one...nooooooo...I needed to keep a family together. "We can't separate these siblings" I said with a tone of finality....Yeah....time to have the head examined. Would I do it again if I had a time machine and could go back to that Saturday afternoon in the Amish country? The answer: I know that I need a therapist. I would make the same decision. Sheesh!

How is the big kid? Well....first of all, I received a letter from the old landlord who is going to a magistrate to slap a lien on me because he has not paid for the sofa and storage as well as the extra things that were broken in the apartment like a bathroom mirror. name is on the lien...not his.....I co-signed the lease so I am the person of record. What am I going to do?

Well, first I am going to strangle a very big kid who has ignored his parents' pleas for the last 5 months...then....I am going to strangle him violence. After all, I am not Hope Solo or a NFL player....but I will do what hurts the most....cut off the support. Yep, I am going to grab that gold American Express card that he pulls out with great frequency and shred it....then I will stomp on it....burn it....and scatter the ashes over his favorite restaurant Chipotle.....revenge, baby!

OK, I have come to my senses.....back to the road to the major leagues....

Yesterday was scout day. This means that there were 16 scouts from major league clubs watching a scrimmage. Was he nervous? Hmmm...yep.....

How did you do?

"Well, I had three weak hits and broke a bat. My velocity was way up. I looked pretty good."

Nice...then what?

"No one talked to me although two scouts talked to Texas."

Was Texas better than you?

"No, he did not throw over 85 and he is right handed.

OK, did anyone else stand out?

"Yep, World Series gave a show."

Did anyone speak to him?


Then why are you looking a the glass half full. Wait and see if you get a letter. want everything now. You have no patience and sense of timing when it comes to these things.

Not that I know anything about scouting and drafts, but I do know that the big guy is a stud and someone will see  him. I gotta feeling.......

And so, fall ball officially begins on Friday night. Who is the Friday night guy?'s the big lefty!!!! Yeah baby....he has finally made it to the Friday start which means....he da!

Will I go to the scrimmage? Hmmmmm......perhaps....perhaps....I am a bit sick of traveling and desperately want to stay home for more than a week. I bought grapes and apples yesterday. I would LOVE to eat them before they go bad. In other words, I am not home enough to buy fresh food and keep it until it is eaten. With the travel, I have had to throw lots of food out since it is not eaten, so I stopped buying it.

Is my son's Friday night start more important than my grapes and apples? Uh....I'm thinking...I'm thinking.....

Speaking of thinking...I gotta go....


Sunday, September 21, 2014

Life in the fast lane

OH boy.....Am I in trouble....I have not posted in almost one week and the natives are getting restless. Can I whine a little?


OK, then I won't BUT.....

School has started.....the students are anxious....lots of meetings....puppies are are nuts....and I am helping dad in the south with electricians and security experts....that's it....oh, by the way, September, albeit a gorgeous month in the northeast, is one of my busiest.

There are a few things to say before jumping into my BPM diatribe.....

"Happy birthday to dear friend Wildcat. She has to be one of my ya girl.....the first time that I met her was on the tennis court in college. Since then, she has shared a number of ups and downs with me. Always a loyal friend.....I wish her the best that life has to offer...."

Second....."Congrats to Sparky and Baker. They were married in their gorgeous backyard last Sunday. The weather was perfect and the party was outstanding."

Glad that I got an invitation to that wedding.....Although.....

Another cousin is hosting a wedding for her daughter. I did not receive an invitation, so I figured that I was not "A" list...or that too many people were on the list.....or that she did not want me there. Anyway that I look at it, it did not matter. It was one less thing to worry about...NOT!

I was asked by Betty why I did not respond to the wedding invitation. Well,  a person cannot respond to a party that she was not invited to, right? Wrong. The invitation was never sent by the wedding planner but my name remains on the list as one of the deadbeats who did not RSVP.

OK, let me be clear. I always respond immediately to invitations like this because I know the enormous amount of time and expense that goes into having a party or wedding. What do I do? Do I contact my cousin and say "Gee, I never received an invitation and heard from Betty that I was actually invited and I would love to come..." Or, do I say to the wedding planner...

"Hey, whzzamatta u?"

Nope, my decision is to punt back to Betty who can help to clear the matter. I am cool with or without any invitation. No worries. Life is too short to obsess over a party list. Hey, I got pups to train.....

Speaking of which, the crate training has failed. They have decided....or maybe the little guy has decided that he will go piddle where ever he pleases...including his own home. Is he a frat boy?
On the other hand, if you dangle kibble in front of his sister, she is yours forever.....I guess that means that she is easy and I had better get them fixed as soon as they hit six months.

In the mean time, I have tried to teach them to give me their paw for a abysmal failure....they ain't gonna do tricks for way....

On to the big guy.....last you heard, he was sick...well, he got sicker....

On Tuesday, he was having trouble speaking and breathing. All I could think of was the epiglotitis that he had last year. Yes, the one that he needed to be admitted to the hospital. And so, after great debate, I decided with dad to run to campus and get him, and bring him home to the family doctor....oh wait! I have to teach a class from 1 to 3 pm.....but what if he has epigolitits and I can't get to him on time?

Oh, I have it. I will bring the students to class an hour early, buy them pizzas since they are missing lunch, and head to campus to pick the guy up to get him to the family doc.

The plan was flawless....right?

What actually happened was that I spoke to the students at 11 am when they were in another class and begged them to stay and not take a break. Knowing that this posed a hardship, I bought 6 pizzas and 30 soft pretzels for the 18 students. As I walked into the classroom, everyone was standing, eating pizza, and ready to go...except two students....

"Uh, Dr. we have time to run to Dunkin Donuts?"

"Huh? we have pizzas....I am starting class....we will be done an hour will miss the beginning of class. But it is your decision..."

Thinking that they would do the right thing....they left and went to DD!

I was shocked. I never would have left, but that's know...uber-responsible me. In college, on Wednesdays, we went from 8 am to 4 pm without a lunch break. Talk about needing dunkin Donuts!

So, I started class and 30 minutes into it, they walk in with their fraps, grab pizza, and sit down. I am still shaking my head about this one....

After class, I thanked each student profusely for their flexibility and jumped into the car....pointed it north and began to drive....Guess what?

As I headed for the turnpike, I got a call not to, I headed home...then dad called....."you should go...."

So, I turned the car around again....then the big kid called...."I'm going to be OK, so don't come...."

Then I put the car in reverse and dad called again...."Go!"

"Don't go"


"Don't go." I got the 8th "don't come...come...." call, I stopped at a mall and went in....time for retail therapy and to make the decision while not driving a car....After a few minutes, I called the kid and finally had a heart to heart.....

For an hour, I stood by the Banana Republic talking to a sick guy who seemed somewhat depressed.

"OK, what the stink is going on? Honesty. I want honest answers!"

"Well....I can't get going.....can't figure things out....exhausted...sick....I am going to break up with the girl friend just as you want...."

What! Break up? Because of me? Oh no.....I don't own this one. I have never said anything negative about this young lady, She is bright and hard working. She has goals and dreams and two jobs. I give her credit for hard work. I have never said anything to him because it's none of my business. If they are be it. If be get involved in your child's love life is a recipe for disaster. I am not walking into that pile of poo. No way.

"I thought that you did not like her...."

Huh? She's nice. And she smells good. She made him happy. What is there not to like? Oh, yeah, the distance. Long distance relationships never work out. Let me be clear...they never work out unless you are P Diddy and have a private plane. If you are a college student whose sofa is still in storage, then you are not the guy who will be successful in this type of relationship.

"Oh. OK, well I like her, mom. She listens to me and talks me off the ledge."

Dude, she's a girl friend. Not a therapist....

"I want to keep the relationship going..." comment from me. Do what makes you happy....

After an hour, he felt better, planned on shaving and went to the library. Mom-therapy....that's all it took....

Still in the mall, I headed to Macy's to check out the clearance rank....had a coupon on my smart phone but never found anything that I really wanted so I headed home wondering what the heck happened to my day.....

And so, my now can see why I have not written and promise to be more diligent this weekend. Fall ball is heating up and so is the college party scene.....

More later!


Monday, September 15, 2014

Pink eye!

Good day! It's the day after Sparky and Baker's wedding day and the first day of my diet. That's right. I went into this with a bang as I ate not one, not two, but three pieces of cake at the reception. Let me clarify.....they were three very small pieces. Nonetheless, I knew once I tried on my fall pants that even though the slices were tiny, my hips are not. Time to count points.....

How is the big guy? Well, he has tonsillitis and pink eye...ew.....And he is miserable.....He gets sick at the beginning and end of every semester. Perhaps he is touching his face too much. But with 40K students on campus, there are enough germs to launch an ebola plague in the mountains. A person has to know how to stay healthy. This is something that I know a bit about, yet, my children are not interested in my wisdom, so I keep it to myself...and stay healthy....just tired....a bit cranky.....and doughie....oh-so-doughie.....speaking of which "no more donuts!"

This happens to me each September. I enjoy the summer way too much. Although, with the traveling, my diet has been mostly carbs and bananas. I am too squeamish to eat fresh food in airports, so I grab something really healthy like Swedish fish....Yeah, I know, they are pure sugar and not real fish....yeah, yeah.

Since the big guy has been sick, he has not contacted me. I think that he is getting better, according to dad. And so, as he stays on his antibiotics, he is frantic that the coaches will think that he is faking his illness. "I gotta get back..." Uh, yes, but remember (oops...some unwanted advice), conjunctivitis AKA pink eye is highly contagious. The team probably wants you to stay in your apartment until you are on the antibiotics for a few days. Until then, he is wearing his Clark Kent glasses because he cannot wear the contacts.

Not much else going on....the Beast and I lost our play off game on Saturday. This league is officially over and is in the books. We start another Saturday league this upcoming weekend.

Time to go....the pups have a vet appointment.


Saturday, September 13, 2014

No more advice

Good morning! Rain....rain...rain...there is nothing more yukky than two soaking wet dogs and their owner walking around the backyard  trying to find just the right spot to piddle and see...with the rain, the scents are changed, so this throws the puppies into a quandary...let's Nope.....let's try over here...nope....just not right...It's like Goldilocks...."Ahh, this is just right...." Once they are in the house and dried off, it is time to walk them again...and again...and again....It's fun! NOT!

How is the big lefty?

In the morning, he called to complain about their two work outs/day plus bullpen sessions. "I can't throw with my legs in such condition after lifting."

Here was my suggestion which is sneaky and probably not the best motherly advice...."Get together with the pitchers and blow your bullpens. In other words, throw like %$#*%^ and tell the pitching coach that your legs are shot after such rigorous and unnecessary work outs."

Sounds like a plan, right? Uh, wrong. I forgot that he does not listen to me so he rejected my advice and threw anyway. When he called dad last night, he shared that he had a great bullpen session.

Hmmm...nice, I think....

OK, why am I perturbed that he threw well? Actually, I am glad that he threw like a champion. I am just a bit peeved that he calls to complain and I continue to forget that he does not want advice, he wants to vent. When I made this observation, he agreed. The young man does not want my advice, he wants me to close my mouth and listen.

Dang, that is really hard to do. After all, aren't I supposed to have all of the answers? I have been doing this mom-thing for a while and have some experience. Often, I can see through the bull and figure out the solution. But I believe that my boy is now telling me that he is finished with mom-training and can handle it on his own. Fine. You got it.....I will try to remember to listen. he has had his basic training and has been promoted through the ranks. He is ready to be launched.

All I have to do is etch this new paradigm in my mind and stop forgetting that the kids are no longer kids, they are young adults. I would feel pretty old about this except, the talker in the seat next to me on the plane after telling me his life story thought that I had little kids and not kids in their 20's. Perhaps, he needs to get his vision checked....ooops....I more advice unless someone specifically asks me.

This is going to be tough. Gotta go...our tennis team has district championships today and I am scheduled to play with the Beast. More about the playoffs latre.


Thursday, September 11, 2014

Spinach salad

Good morning! It's a beautiful day and time to get going.
I apologize for not posting more but school has started and I am pressed for time as I scramble to catch up with work. Part of my job has been to interview prospective students, therefore I have had to resort to SKYPE and use it at different times of day and night. The applicants like it because they do not have to go to campus. I am not crazy about it because I could be online with them any time of the day based on their schedule.....The good part about it, is that I can wear pajama bottoms and a nice top as I try to look uber-professional. OK, that is my only issue of the week....not so bad....although....

I spent 10 hours trying to get to South Carolina yesterday. Let me tell you....I was not pleased as I sat in Philly airport for 4 hours watching lots of planes leave for Atlanta, yet mine sat on the runway waiting for a part....then as I ran through Atlanta airport trying to catch my connection (I already missed 2), I made a mental note to start running again. As I arrived at the gate after weaving through countless travelers, I watched my gate close without me in the plane. Asking for another flight, I had the dubious honor of sitting between two large gentlemen as we flew to Savannah. Midway through the flight, I thought that I was perspiring because the two guys were in my space and I had no room, but the pilot announced that there was a problem with a plane generator and we did not have air conditioning. Ahh...that explains it.

No A/ 2 big arm or leg and out....Oh, by the way, we flew lower and slower so that we did not overheat the left over and out.....Hail Mary.....

How is the big guy? Well, he has his semi annual cold. Yep, he overdoes it....does not take care of himself...gets salty.....finally feels better. He claims that he is still throwing well, which is good. But he complains that the trainer has them lifting weights twice a day then he throws. When I suggested that this may be due to current research in athletics and best practice models, he said something that I cannot repeat "%$($$$*$@)&!!.

'Nuff said.....I asked about the sofa....

"working on it...."

I asked about the internship...

"working on it...."

I asked about the post grade point averages in the locker room as the shortstop continues to look at his 2.1....

"still there...."

Yep...the Czar continues to humiliate the guys thinking that he is motivating them through this tactic. Uh huh...yeah, I definitely wanted my senior year gpa posted too....not! I worked all four years plus played on the tennis team twice a year leaving a little time for studying PLUS I had an incredibly hard major. During my senior year, I got sick of the juggling and left the team. I could not handle it any more and it was time to grow up.

These guys have a commitment to stay, yet the Czar is making it difficult. As I explained in class this week, a leader does not yell or embarrass to motivate. Motivation is intrinsic...within each of us. Therefore, it is up to the leader to find out what motivates each person. In my son's case, he wants to excel and get to the next level. Therefore, yelling, humiliating, benching, and so on have little effect except to anger him.

By the way, the Czar loved his essay on Evan Longoria which means that the lefty has finally figured out how to play the coach's game of 'love me...fear me....respect me...honor me...worship me....' Yep, he got it. Now all he has to do is to keep his head down, mouth shut, and throw the darn ball....that's it.

OK, I have a mountain of things to do starting with returning a zillion calls on my cell phone...

By the way, Sparky and the Baker are getting married on Sunday.

I have the honor of making 175-200 portions of spinach salad. I have to get my head around the math as I try to figure out the number of cups of cider vinegar....oh yeah...the secret ingredient.....honey! Sunday morning should be fun in the BP mom house as I put BP Grandmom, Grandpop, Tink, and anyone else who wants to chop mangoes and zest lemons....any takers? Frank Sinatra will be singing in the chopping veggies to the smooth sounds of the Chairman of the Board....