Friday, January 25, 2013

Leaving the bathrobe at home

It's Friday...Friday...Friday! One day before the big baseball banquet and I am still looking at my clothes trying to find the least embarrassing, wall flower-ish, covering all body parts like the Muslim women do- outfit. Let's consider this, the banquet is being held in the mountains, therefore, there is snow on the ground....

This will eliminate the neon orange, low cut blouse to my navel and evening gown....
Also off the list are:
  • 6" spiked heels
  • leather boots that cover the entire leg
  • black motorcycle jacket with the skull and cross bones on the back
  • straight leg denim jeans with holes in the knees that are so tight that I cannot sit down.
  • my spiky Cher and Tina Turner wig.
  • my fleece bathrobe that I just bought at Boscovs for 75% off (such a deal!)
  • Tinker Bell pajamas with the little hearts on them
  • my straight from Elizabeth Taylor's collection 24 carat emerald necklace with the diamond baguettes (is that a loaf of bread or cut of stone?) 
I am going to have to settle for option 9, which is a black skirt that flows below the knees, boots, and a turtleneck sweater. Victoria Justice ClothesYes, I have made the decision and will stand in the corner with a Shirley Temple drink in my hand and my mouth closed only opening it to sip my drink.  I will only speak when spoken to and then it will be about the chicken and green beans on the plate. Perhaps if I am lucky, the cheesecake for dessert will be defrosted before it is served.

Yes, my big plan is to not embarrass the big kid and let him know that I have his back. The guys will not be talking about the crazy lady who appeared on campus with a cooler full of food for her son, waterproof and warm boots, and his shirt and tie. Nope, someone else's parent is going to have to be the topic of conversation around the Gatorade cooler in the dugout. What can I say? I'm just that kind of mama...

Anyway, on to another topic close to my hips...the bill came in for the two cases of Girl Scout cookies.....let's just say that I think that I have been inducted into the neighborhood hall of fame. As I wrote the $100 check, I thought that I really need to have my head examined. Why would a person on Weight Watchers buy not only one box of cookies but two cases? What is it about me and impulse buying? Do I have a psychological disorder or do I really love thin mint cookies? What would a therapist say about me? I'll tell you what my husband thinks....better not....he had to go to work early today to pay for my cookie addiction.

By the way, I do not plan on eating any of the cookies...for my family and friends in the region...guess what you are getting for your birthdays?

Gotta at safe.

1 comment:

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