Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Titanic

Good Morning....I just had my first cup of coffee in a week and it was wonderful!

I spoke with Buddy late last night. He was in the lobby of a Comfort Inn working on his homework and projects. It was quiet and he was alone so he took time to call us. He shared with me that he was up to date with his school work and had earned an "A" in a quiz last week. He was starting to figure out the system and seemed more relaxed about school. This indeed was a break through....

This comfort was a long time coming.....in July before his freshman year, he took it upon himself to select his own courses while I not so patiently waited for him to ask for my assistance....That request never came...in fact, what I was asked to do was 'butt out'(inferred, not actually verbalized by my son)...Despite my protests and sharing with him my resume (I am a college professor), he did not want to discuss his course selections (calculus, astronomy, economics, some course all athletes take....). Horrified, I told him that he may want to consider talking to his athletic adviser before the schedule is finalized...."No, mom....I have it...you don't understand this school..." Got it...I don't understand his school....no idea...3 degrees....25 years of teaching experience in higher education....I don't understand....OK...time to back off and watch the Titanic hit the iceberg... not the lettuce the very big glacier that has more icy treachery beneath the surface than above the water....

Well, the Titanic eventually hit and began to sink in early October (later than I predicted)....thinking that he could figure it out on his own, he was called in by the athletic adviser and coaches for a "chat"...but before that, he had logged in more hours in study hall than in the history of the university (according to the cute girl at the front desk). Forces were then mobilized, the Coast Guard was sent out to rescue the sinking ship...the USS Buddy was floundering on the open sea...rudderless...then it happened....a mentor...a tutor in every subject...a visit to each professor....writing notes...opening the books, not attending every party that he was invited or not invited to, and so on...it began to adhere....he saw the light house in the distance...

After a month or so of diligence, the grades began to rise. There was some breathing room in his grade point average. In fact, he was close to earning honors. What a miracle! He was starting to feel better about himself and worked with his mentor to establish a schedule. The mentor even told him when to eat and take breaks...bossy...but it was effective. Today, he continues to work with the mentor, has been proactive in contacting tutors, and is ahead of the curve. I wish that I could report that it was magic...but it wasn't...it was a lesson that he had to learn without me. My boy is growing up. He figured it out on his own and has been using the resources available to him.

So there you have it. Once again, lessons life has to offer are more compelling than parental advice. During the highs and lows, we were available to listen and counsel. The ball was in his glove and he had to throw it across the plate to continue at the university. Fortunately, he threw a strikeout with his curve ball as he continues to mature and develop....I am impressed....

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